EXPLORING SPIRITUALITY

Spirituality is a subject that extolls varying responses from different persons, the response can vary based on individual experiences, religious or atheistic bend of mind, environment and broadly or rather more specifically on individual sensitivity or proclivity to issues of the soul.

The journey has been a subject of debate and exploration since the time of the sages when man started exploring religions in its varied form. The prophets and seers have toiled to explain the mysteries. Fascinating stories and simple tales abound which seemed to strike a chord whenever we heard them since our childhood days; starting with the grandma tales.

The modern man; the educated man; is a man who revels in his ability to reason and choose. The rigid ceremony and superstitions are almost revulsive to him, at most he would pander to festive or last rite duties and keep safe distance from the religious practices. However in many cases there is a phase of exploration, despite the busy schedules an attempt to connect to something more sublime than the glitzy world around us. This piece is to share my experiences as part of these lost souls.

To begin with, the early exposure to religion was non serious but an occasional exposure to temple visits, gurudwara visits, some 'jagratas', a few trips to holy shrines and the family prayers on festive occasions. Stories from Ramayan and Mahabharat, tales of Mira Bai, Sarvan Kumar, Kabir, Prahlad et al. However, the first exposure to spiritualism was in form of a three day meditation capsule run by some foreigners of Iskon in our Catholic Brothers run school. It was an exposure to something more sublime than ritualistic prayer. Over the years I came back to these lessons on meditation; especially at times of personal stress or even happiness. The experience build up to more serious attempts as one grew.

The period in school and then steps into adulthood including the young years as an officer brought one close to experiences which one can call coincidences but in my heart I knew they were more than coincidences; the hints of something larger controlling our lives just got bolder. The modern mind would try to explain the incidents as a form of the sixth sense. However the sense of wonder and awareness that something more than the textbook learning existed, something that did not seem pressing in need but may ultimately be more important. The notion that just do your bit of good deeds and rest will follow did hold for most; ironically thats what the Gita 'sar' on calendars reiterates. A hidden urge to explore more would creep in at times of solitude in the field tenures or by experiences that made one wonder, something akin to the 'Bruce Almighty' experiences of Jim Carrey, a film that's a nice take on a modern man's clash with the idea of God. How we expect God to be or rather how we expect him to behave, unconsciously we want to define how God would be if at all - we know all?

Shortly before the tenure of duty at Congo, at a traffic light in Delhi, I was approached by who else .... but followers of Iskon, after an interval of two decades! They gifted me a set of books urging me to buy a copy of the Gita. In true spirit of the modern man, I kept the free books but left the buying of the Gita for later; unsure if I would read them, but they got packed and reached Congo. A period of more time with the self. Reading was a favourite activity, the books got read! The student learnt some more.

At the same time the Ramdev pranayam phenomenon was catching up, some good friends were followers and good teachers. Early morning were our own! a big change in soldiers life. I slowly got into a routine with a mix of meditation, pranayam and physical exercises. Each was typically a 30 minute effort, a normal day would have two of the activities. Overtime I realised the mood of the day decided what one would do, on a good day pranayam and meditation would get preference, on a lazy day I would end up doing the physical exercises package!! Overall the net effort required was minimum for physical exercise, then pranayam and lastly the maximum motivation for meditation. It slowly dawned that meditation was not an option for the weak! The physical activity part of paranayam made it more doable, physical exercise though contributed substantially to the feel good factor actually were the easiest to complete once one got down to doing it. In case of meditation trying to tame the mind definitely took some effort, at times within five minutes one would give up and choose to do the abs crunch instead. It was a fruitful year in self discovery.

Later in life when migraine was tending to dominate life caused sudden return to yoga, specifically to Ramdev's pranayam gave distinct benefits both in health and mental peace. Baba Ramdev started dominating the morning time, you could agree or disagree with his words but the positive effect on health and the link between yoga and dhyan were undeniable. Pranayam ending with Bhastika did help in the process of meditation. The challenge was to sit still to meditate, till date its a struggle and a tough assignment to crack.

India provides diverse options to explore spirituality both in terms of religions and the various sects that dot the countryside. The various channels beaming in religion or spirituality in various forms did add to the options and to the confusion. The living gurus with thousands of followers. The seemingly new age Brahm Kumari or Sri Sri Ravishankar who talked of spirituality with lesser reference to religion, did hold interest longer than most other gurus. Islam as an option is tough to explore as a hindu because of distinct gap in methods and conduct; however one can easily explore options like Buddhism, Sikhism, Christanity and in a limited manner Jainism, Jainism being more austere and strict is tougher to make inroads into. In all whatever you try enriches you.

Spending time in Ladakh and with Tibetans Buddhism and its effect of peace and spiritual strength so palpable in most monks; has awed me over last few decades. Their ease with religion, the general demeanour, the buddha figurines, the stupas, the holy chants ..... everything made me envy the holy monks who seem so much at peace with themselves and the world. The opportunity to visit the monastery at Tawang was something I simply grabbed. The monastery is the teaching ground of little monks as young as six or seven onwards. I did have images of youtube showing Taliban and Wahhabi sects teaching koran to little kids in Pakistan. On being told of the early morning prayer as a part of training of the little monks, one was curious to see it. Reaching there at morning five on a cold November morning, we were greeted by an ageing monk who guided us to a seat in the prayer room, a magnificent temple with imposing figures of Buddha and other saints. There was absolute silence as we sat and tried to meditate. The children were yet to arrive as they were in a morning schedule, maybe some morning exercise or something akin, close to six suddenly the little monks streamed into the prayer room. The silence was gone as these kids rushed to their seats, giggling and almost in a playful mode. A senior monk seated on a special place started chanting some hymns, the kids joined in, it sounded great and I mentally got ready for a long meditative experience. However, after a hymn or two most of the kids went quiet. Some continued to join in spurts. The little ones were seated in discipline but chatting and exchanging playful pokes even as the senior Monk continued with the chants. Some other senior monks were sitting on corners in meditative pose, looking all peaceful and serene; the quality that strikes you first when you meet a monk. The prayer went on for next half an hour and ended in salt tea being served to all. We relished the tea as the prayer ended and the little monks streamed out to be served the morning breakfast which they collected from a point set up next to the kitchen. The mood was anything but sombre or religious, the entire thing did not match my image of religious school. One teenager shared that they joined the chants in the beginning as they had been taught that, the later hyms are yet to be learnt, those who knew others joined in. They would keep joining as they learnt more and more. What struck me was the ease with which the students were allowed to experience religion along with conventional education. The students each one of them looked and behaved like a volunteer, enjoying his initiation. The senior monks too looked content in just exposing the kids to Buddhism and allowing each child to choose his own pace to experience spirituality. The monks seemed too immersed in their own prayer to fret over how to guide these little energetic souls, there was no effort to force things. I carry the images close to my heart.

On another occasion a saint explained, there are three elements in human being. The first one being the sensory body which we use to experience the world, the second the mind which explores, rationalises and builds options for actions, the third is the element which takes the final call on what to do, the Karma that we choose. This third element can cause us to do wrong or give in to desires even though the rational mind told us it is bad, the choice between rational and desires is the eternal quest. Some call it the soul, but it is the final decision making element. We have various methods to take care of sensory body from exercises to modern medical science, for the brain we start education early in life and it goes on for most of our life, converting experience to wisdom. However the third element is largely left to the individual and hence gets relegated to the least important. Spirituality is an attempt to strengthen and train the third element.

It is in training the third element that we falter. Largely because there are no degrees in this one can show to have moved on, its a very private and individual journey. To keep it simple let me just quote 'just as a man thinketh so he shall be'. The realisation that thoughts matter is important; the false impression that only actions matter does not convey the need to work on our thoughts, this misinformation needs to be corrected. Thoughts drive our actions and destiny - this simple fact can lead to right priorities. Purity of thought is an active effort, an activity that requires training. This training can be in meditation, yoga or prayer. Everyone to his own choice but this training is important.

      Spirituality is largely an individual affair. While we may follow a religion or sect, our   routes and methods of the journey are very personal. Even within a family the methods, beliefs, inclination and spiritual growth vary. The favourite question of parents my age is how to guide our kids? This has no easy explanation, the basic dictum of teaching by example remains true as ever. Kids by nature are more amenable to learn while younger and tougher as they get into their teens. They rightly reason and would follow only if your actions seems rational to them. The simplest bet is let them see you explore your own spiritual growth, they would pick leads and follow. No method is perfect in any case our own experience; so full of self doubts is so limited to really take the mantle of a guru, who knows the child may be  ahead of you in his/her spiritual journey. The Tawang monastery experience gives hints at what we could do at our homes. Be a role model, the child will pickup faster than you would imagine, younger the better. Let them find their own way, but be  role model by being a person who is exploring his/her spirit/soul, to be a good human being. Maybe this is what sanskar is all about.

Roopesh Mehta
Jul 2012